Remember my proposition of submitting a song parody based on the no-fault law? (see prior posts here and here).  Well, I received yet another song parody.  This song comes to us from one of my close sources, who wishes to remain anonymous. 

“Cripple Creep” sung to the tune of Up on Cripple Creek, by The Band (listen here for the song)

When I get off of this gurney

You know where I want to go

Straight up the five line subway

To Bronx Borough Medical

Bronx Expert Radiology

Little radiologist that I once knew

And he told me just to come on by

If there’s anything he could do

Up for DME he sends me

If I spring a disc he mends me

I don’t have to speak my lawyer defends me

An insurance dream if I ever did see one

Phantom driver had just struck me

To the dentist I did go

He bet on TMJ

And I got my prescription to go

Odds were in my favor

I had the adjuster five docs to one

When that IME appointment came around

I was sure that I had won

I took all of my MRIs

And I gave that IME doctor half

And he looked at them and just shook his head

And I just had to laugh

Now there’s one thing in the whole wide world

I sure would like to see

That’s when that IME report shows up

And they try to use it to deny me

Up for NCVs he sends me

I just sign the sheets he pays me

I don’t have to work he disables me

An insurance dream if I ever did see one

Loo, loo hooooooo . . .

Lodi, lodi, lodi hoooooo . . . . .

Now, there’s arbitration out in Queens

And this massage therapy is getting old

And this living off no-fault wages

Is almost three years old

So I guess I’ll call up my employer

Tell him I’ll be rolling in

But you know, deep down, I’m kinda tempted

To go and see my chiropractor again.

Up for EMGs he sends me

Household help and mileage he gets me

I don’t have a maid but I get paid

An insurance dream if I ever did see one

Loo, loo hooooooo . . . .

Lodi, lodi lodi hoooooooo . . . .